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A/N: This story is a story written by two authors.
Some months ago k3mylois on youtube (k3josai on divine intervention, fanfiction.net and kryptonsite) asked me if I'd like to write a fafnic with her. I agreed and the stroy began.

Real life and time differences made it a little difficult to write it but some how we managed to finish. I have to say that most of this story is Josai's work. Without her this story wouldn't exist. But I really liked to do this and I thank her for challenging me and for her patience with me.

Then I want to thank Lily aka lilah1986 for her work as beta. You really helped to make this story better.

Josai made a vid for this fanfic. If you like you can watch it before reading.

SET YOU FREE

by k3josai and C_K_unlimited (barb1808, for those who already saw the story elsewhere)

Disclaimer: No copyright infrightment intended. We were only playing with the characters.


Scene I: Clark’s Farewell

Lois’s POV

He was out there somewhere. I was here, keeping myself busy by typing anything that came into my mind. My article was almost done. With few clicks on the keyboard and now, I pressed the period button it was finished. Glancing sideways, I saw my partner coming from out of nowhere with tousled hair and an unshaven face. He had slumped shoulders and unguarded eyes. He was not Smallville. Something was off, I could tell.

I stared at him, very much confused on his physical appearance. He sat on his chair without throwing any attention at me. I didn’t see him for almost four days; I never got any call, email, or text messages from him. I tried to reach him by calling his phone more than ten times only to be answered by his voice mail. We had been dating for two months, we were a couple as we both agreed and taking it slow was one of the rules that we both followed. Based on his actions or the lack of it flamed the mad dog Lane within me. Watching him work across my own desk and seeing how tired he was, the annoyance I had felt for him was replaced by worry. I gazed at him one more time; his full attention was on the computer screen. Déjà vu struck again, as if this already happened way back when. I needed to say something but I opted not to. I shifted my gaze to the blinking message on my desktop computer. It was from him. I looked up, expecting his sheepish grin but I was met by nothingness. He disappeared again, just like the old times. Without thinking twice, I stood and left.

Riding the elevator had been the most boring place for me this late afternoon. I tapped my left foot waiting for the door to open. I stepped outside as soon as it reached the last floor of the Daily Planet building, where Clark and I were working. There I was on the roof with him. He was facing the afternoon sun lowering on the horizon. In few minutes, the dark sky would consume the light. I wondered what was on his mind and what occupied most of it. There were times that I knew him more than I could understand my own self. Then there were times that I couldn’t figure out what was in the head of a certain farm boy and reporter… like today.

Few seconds after, I managed to say nothing but, “Hi!” It didn’t startle him. It was as if he knew that I was there already. He didn’t turn around when he started to speak.

“Lois, thanks for meeting me up here.”

My heart skipped a beat when I heard his voice again. I wanted to run and hug him right there. I missed him so much but I also sensed the scare that crept within me on the things he was about to say.

“You’re welcome, Smallville.” I sighed. “So?” I tried to humor my voice. I waited for him to speak though patience wasn’t one of my virtues. I counted from one to thirty, and then he spoke enough for me to comprehend.

“I have to say goodbye to you.” I stood still. My head almost exploded from what he told me. It couldn’t be.

“Goodbye? What do you mean goodbye?” I asked. The hurt in my voice couldn’t be hidden. It took another thirty seconds before he answered.

“I’m leaving Kansas indefinitely.” Did I hear it right? He was going to leave me for good. Wake up Lane, this is just a bad dream, isn’t it? I looked at his back with his head bowed. We were few steps apart and I couldn’t move from where I stood, something prevented me from doing it.

He took a deep breath as he continued, “La – Lana came back.” I was in a huge shock hearing her name again from him. My heart was crushed; I was trying so hard to breathe some oxygen. Without noticing, my hands on both sides were closed. I looked down, blinking back the tears that were about to fall. After all these years, it was still her; only her.

“We’re leaving Kansas.”

I listened to his broken voice. I didn’t want to hear another word. My heart and mind were incapable to process everything that had been laid in front of me. I heard his footsteps coming. I wanted to slap him hard, curse him, let him know what I felt right at this moment, but it was useless. Nothing would change the fact that he chose her over me. She was pretty, sweet, and damsel in distress-y and not hardheaded, loud-mouthed and independent like me.

“Lois, I’m so sorry.”

I’m sorry? I didn’t want him to say those words. I didn’t want him to pity me. Go on Lane, you’re a soldier; you can’t be hurt or wounded by a bullet or knife. He was just Clark Kent. You can face him with dignity and pride. Because of that, I inhaled and exhaled, I put on my mask – no one could ever read what was within me when I was wearing it. I looked up to be met with his pleading eyes. I smiled. I tried to fake a genuine smile and I succeeded. I reached out to embrace him for one last time.

“Lois?” He whispered.

I held him close. This way I could still feel his warmth and his heartbeat - his heart that had never been mine. And most importantly, to hide stray tears that fell from my eyes. He wouldn’t see how broken I was, I silently promised to myself.

“Fix your life Kent; I know you can do it. And don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.” My own words echoed in my mind.

“Thank you.” He choked again. His hold on me tightened a bit. I wondered if he was willing to let me go or not. His actions versus his words – which was the heavier? I didn’t know the answer.

“Too much gratitude back there huh?” I laughed painfully. I pulled out from his embrace. Suddenly I felt the coldness of the stiff air blowing my hair. I crossed my arms, trying to warm myself.

I punched him slightly on his chest and stared at him straight in the eyes, my smile never faded. His eyes focused on my face, searching something from the way he was looking at me. With one last stretch of bravery, I finally said. “Goodbye Clark.”

I didn’t wait for his reply, I turned around, and suddenly everything came into slow motion. I tried to feel nothing but a chilly early evening and a numb heart. My world collided, no one else knew, but me. I was setting him free. I was letting him use his wings to fly where he truly belonged. I reached the parking area, I don’t know how, but I managed to get there. Was I too strong to face this situation? Or was I just too hypocritical to give in? No matter what you do Lois; you can’t escape a battle without having any bruise or wound. I wiped another batch of tears that fell. Then I started the car’s engine. This was where Lois and Clark’s journey ended.



Scene II: One Last Look

CLARK’s POV

Minutes had passed since Lois left. I was still here – all alone on the top of the Daily Planet roof – wearing my office clothes. I kept repeating in my head that I made the right choice but my heart was telling me that it was the worst decision that I ever did in my entire life. For The Blur – the hero of Metropolis and the one they looked up to – that was the wisest thing to do, to turn my back on the one constant person who made my imperfect life complete. For Clark Kent – the mild manner reporter of Daily Planet – I needed her more than anything in this universe, Lois was my everything and she would always be. A few minutes ago, I broke her heart. I expected her to say all the hurtful things by not keeping my promise to her. I was just another proof of a man who made promises that were bound to be broken. I wanted her to hurt me physically - slap me, punch me, beat me – she needed to release all the pain that I brought her. I wanted her to get mad at me and make me feel guilty all the time. Looking at her, pleading helplessly, though I said few words I knew how things changed and our world crashed and burned. I thought she was going to break down but I realized it wasn’t her style. Locking all her emotions, she just smiled at me and never asked for further explanation. This was Lois. She was the one who understood unspoken truths. The only woman I loved and I would love more than forever. Tonight, I let her go. That was the toughest thing to do – my sacrifice. I should live with that. We were going to be fine. Definitely, we were going to be fine, soon… But everything was just a lie.

I replaced my suit in a second. Here I was, The Blur in his monotonous black attire. I opened my super hearing and carefully listened to any screams of help. I stood on the ledge and watched the stars up above and the city lights below the skyscrapers. I couldn’t tell the difference. Keeping the world safe meant to keep Lois safe too and let her live without knowing the truth about me. I closed my fists, I leapt up, ready to fight for Earth’s safety. But then I landed on one of the tallest buildings of Metropolis- my favorite place. This was from where I could see Lois freely. Unbeknownst to her, every night I was here keeping an eye on her. Tonight, it was going to end. There she was standing on the balcony of her apartment, shedding tears – nobody could even witness this but me. I was torn apart watching her vulnerable and defenseless, this wasn’t the Lois that I knew – full of life and hope. It wasn’t going to be as easy as I thought. I opened my voice modifier as I dialed her number.

When her cell phone rang, I saw Lois jumping in her chair.

I need a hero! I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night...

She hesitated a moment. I wish I knew what was going on in her mind in that second.

“Hello?” Lois' voice sounded raspy like she hadn't been talking for a while.

“Good evening, Miss Lane! How are you?” My voice was deep and warped as usual and I saw Lois shivering a little.

She took a deep breath before she answered with the brightest fake-smile she could manage,
“I'm fine.”

I paused a second. I knew it wasn't true. Should I just accept her lie? I couldn't so I asked, “Are you sure?”

I heard Lois breathing in sharply. She dropped her shoulders and sighed. With my X-ray, I saw her eyes beginning to sparkle from unshed tears and her voice had a hint of drowning: “No. I'm not fine.”

A sad smile crossed my face. I knew Lois. She never hid something from me when I talked to her as the Blur.

“What's wrong?”

Down in the balcony of her apartment, Lois took all her courage and opened her heart to me,
“You know I was dating my colleague and one of my best friends. We knew each other for years. First, I couldn't stand him. Then I began slowly to fall for him. I even thought he could be you – for a moment.” Lois' words fell from her lips like a waterfall and hit me right in my heart. “When we were together I felt stronger and – safe. He drove me crazy – still does – and he made me smile.”

I shrunk in my black coat. It hurt to hear her wrapping up the story of our relation in such short words. They reminded me of all the good times we had spent together. But I had to ask the next question, the Blur would have to ask it although Clark Kent in me didn't want to, “What happened?”

I couldn't hide a little rasping in my voice. Lois hesitated for a second but then she went on slowly: “He broke up with me. He said he was still in love with his former girlfriend from high school who disappeared a while ago. A part of me tells me that he's lying but he's not the kind of guy who lies right to your face, you know. I never thought he could break my heart like that. I guess the reason why he never told me that he loved me was because no one could replace her in his heart. Of course, I don’t blame him. It’s my fault. I expected more than what he could give to me.”

The last sentence was barely a whisper but for me on the roof it was loud enough to echo in my heart.

“I'm sorry.” Was all I managed to say. My tongue felt like glued to my palatine.

With a sob, Lois replied, “It's not your fault. I am sorry that I lay all that on you. It's just – I don't want my friends to know how bad I feel since they're all his friends as well. I can't even tell my cousin because she is his best friend. You know I bury myself in work and as long as I do so, I get through the day. But when you asked – I just couldn't lie to you.”

Her words felt like knives stabbed into my heart.

What have I done?

She added, “Before, I was wondering what would happen if she came back. Will he choose her or me?” She paused for so long. It was too heartbreaking, I had to force myself not to sit down and tears blurred my vision. I switched off the X-ray. I couldn't see anything now anyway. But my hearing still followed Lois' heartbeat and her breathing reminded me of her presence on the phone.


I cleared my throat and whispered, “Close your eyes.” She did so without asking any questions. In a blur, I enveloped her in an embrace. She buried her face in my chest while sobbing earnestly. She whispered, “now, I know the answer.”

I cried too when she said those words. In a world full of wrong choices, I made another mistake in my life. It was so painful that we had to separate our ways like this. I rubbed her back trying to give her comfort and be here with her as The Blur, as her friend. When her sobs subsided, she said thank you without looking up. She might be afraid that I would disappear once she saw my face. With the last strength that I had, I loosened my hold on her. She hesitated for a while; I could sense it the way she held me. Later on, her hands fell on her sides. This was the time, the final letting go on my part. I kissed the top of her head, and then I disappeared before she could even open her eyes.



to be continued...

Scene III: I Had Kept You in My Heart

Lois’s POV

A year had passed since I last saw him right across from where I sat. His chair and table remained unoccupied. I didn’t know why no one wanted to sit in his place. Maybe, no one could cope up with me; the hard-headed reporter of The Daily Planet.

The days and nights were too hard for me. Whatever I did, wherever I went… He was always with me, silently I had kept him in my heart, whether I admit it or not, I couldn’t forget him. Maybe it was because deep down within me, beyond the hypocrisy on the outside, I was still waiting for him to come back. And maybe one of these days, he would realize that we were meant to be… Or maybe not.

When my phone rang I hesitated answering and checked the caller ID first. It was Oliver Queen, another former boyfriend, owner of the Daily Planet and one my closest friends.

“Hi Ollie! What's up?” I never told him about my still existing feelings for Clark so I faked a smile to make my voice sound happy.

“Hello beautiful! How are you?” Although we managed to become good friends post break up, he still couldn't stop flirting with me. It was part of the Queen charm.

“I'm fine as always. What about you? Are you back in Metropolis for the day and looking for someone to hang out with?” I teased him back as usual.

“No. I'm still in Star City. There are as much criminals to be fought here as in Metropolis and my day job keeps me here too.” He smiled. “And it's because of the work that I'm calling.”

“Does our favorite billionaire need another sidekick for information?”

Ollie reacted with laughter. It was good that at least one of us could laugh freely. I hadn't genuinely laughed since Clark had left me.

“No, Lois. It's um...” He cleared his throat. “There are some changes ahead for The Planet. Um, I'm not so sure if you'll like them.”

“Spill it Ollie!” His hesitating made me nervous. “If you're going to fire me do it already!”

“No! Nobody wants to fire you. You're one of the best reporters working there.” His voiced sounded more relaxed now.

“That's what they usually say before you get fired.”

He laughed. “Yes. You're right. Those were the wrong words. No. It's not about firing someone. It's about hiring. We finally decided to get a replacement for Clark. Will you be okay with someone new sitting in his chair?”

Oh no. I knew that this would happen one day. But I never expected the sharp pain in my chest that I felt now that it did happen. Covering it, I replied laughing:

“Ollie, you own the Planet! You don't have to ask me for permission when you're doing staff decisions.”

He took a deep breath.

“Are you sure? I mean we both know that you're still in love with him. And I thought you may not like it...”

I interrupted him.

“Ollie! He is gone! He left a year ago and has never called or even sent an e-mail since. And my feelings are the last thing to care about when there are decisions to make for the Planet!”

He sighed and I wasn't sure if it was because he accepted what I said or because he stopped trying to make me tell him about my feelings.

“Lois, you know that you mean a lot to me and that I'm here for you.” He said calmly.

“Yes, Ollie. I know. But there's nothing to talk about concerning a certain farm boy.”

We ended the call with our usual well-wishing and the promise to see each other when Ollie was in town. When I put my phone down I felt like someone was sitting on my chest. I had to go outside and get some air. So I got my bag and left the bullpen.

I strayed through the big city that was my home which I loved. People were passing by and I let myself drift through the streets. I ended up at a Department Store where I wandered through the clothing department. It had been a while since I went shopping for clothes and I needed some new tops. The old ones reminded me too much of him and I had to do something to get over him. Maybe this could help me.

When I reached the last row of blouses, I saw her. She was as beautiful and lovely as she always had been. Lana Lang was standing right there looking through different pullovers and blouses. Luckily, she was so concentrated that she didn't see me and I hid between some coat-stands. When she moved on, I saw her rounded belly.

It hit me like lightning. Lana was expecting! She was carrying his child. Although I never thought of having children of my own, my family history was too twisted for that, I was shocked to see Lana pregnant – and – while I couldn't do else but stare at her belly - I felt something crawling up my back and I had to admit I was jealous.

Lana had everything. She had him and with him, she started a family. Too late, I realized that she had spotted me and with a big smile, she came towards me.

“Hey, Lois! Wow! It's been a long time since we met the last time!”

“Oh, Lana! Yes. It's been quite a while. How are you? I see you're expecting.” I faked my smile. If it hadn't been for Clark I may had been honestly happy to see her.

“Oh, I'm fine. We're so happy about the baby and I had to fight that I was allowed to come to Metropolis and see Aunt Nell one last time before the baby was be born. How about you? I read your articles. It seems to be going good for you at The Planet.”

“Yeah... Yeah I love my work there. You know me, I can't stand secrets and now I get money for uncovering them.” I tried to be convincing to show her how fine I was. But it didn't feel right.

Then I didn't know what else to say and a short silence fell between us. We looked at each other and started simultaneously: “How's Clark?”

I couldn't believe it! Lana asked me how Clark was?

Startled I looked at her. “I thought he was with you! I thought he was the father of your baby.”

In Lana's eyes, I saw surprise and amusement. “No. I'm with Pete. Pete Ross. He was Clark's best friend in high school but he left Smallville with his mom before you showed up there. We're married for quite a while now. Why did you think I was with Clark?”

Her words tore my world apart. It felt like the earth beneath me had gone and I was falling endless into the dark. In search of hold, I reached out and grabbed one of the coat-stands next to me. The cold of the metal-stand felt like ice in comparison to the heat I felt inside of me but my fingers were cold as well.

“Lois? What's wrong?” Lana looked concerned and held me for support. “You're pale like a wall. Better take a seat and get something to drink. Come on.”

Lana maneuvered me to a coffee shop and made me sit down. When she came with two mugs of steaming Assam, we started to talk. I still don't know how but she made me tell her everything from the beginning of Clark and me dating to him leaving me and disappearing.

When I finished I felt somehow relieved and empty. If he didn't leave me for Lana, why did he go anyway? Or did he try to get to her and stop when he saw her with Pete?

Lana's soft words came through my thoughts: “Lois, I haven't seen Clark for almost two years now. But back then I saw that he was starting to fall for you. And from what Chloe told me, in her e-mails and phone calls, Clark loved you more than he ever had loved me. But I can't tell you what made him leave you.”

She knew something that I didn’t know. Why did Clark lie to me? Was that for the best for both of us? But he broke my heart; he left me wounded like no one else could.

“Thanks Lana. It’s good to see you again.” I stood up and hugged her before I left. There were too many questions left unanswered.

Where are you Clark?

Scene IV: Writing Through Pain

Lois’s POV

I walked towards The Daily Planet still unsure of my feelings about what I discovered. Lana didn’t end up with Clark. Where was he?

My thoughts were spinning so fast that I wasn't able to grab one and process it. If Clark wasn't with Lana, why did he leave me? What happened to him that he disappeared completely?

Reaching my desk I was ready to call Martha Kent to find out if she could tell me something about her son's whereabouts. But sitting down I saw that someone had occupied the desk next to me and I felt a knife in my heart again. How could someone hurt me over and over again without being present?

Oh, Smallville! How I wish I could talk to you right now. I need my best friend back. Even if can't be the girl of your dreams, which is obvious since you left me, it would help me a lot to have you and your friendship around.

Unconsciously I opened the lowest drawer of my desk grabbed the name tag I hid there and turned it in my hands. The white letters on it seemed to laugh at me. I could hear them teasing me: CLARK KENT, he's gone! He left you alone and you will soon have to work with someone else!

With a sigh, I placed the tag next to my computer screen and opened a file named 'brain farts'. I had started it months ago and continued every time I wanted to talk to Clark. I had begun to write down everything I wanted to tell him. Every little thought that I liked to share with him was written down there and protected with the password 'hero of my heart'.

This evening it took me a long time to write everything down including my hurt, my worries and my hopes.

I decided to read again all the notes that I wrote for him… A silent conversation between Clark and me… I would rather say between my computer and me. It was just a stupid hobby of mine to put everything that I felt on this inanimate object. What if someone would hack this one and read everything about my unwavering feelings for a certain farm boy whose whereabouts was still unknown? It didn’t matter anyway. Who would care about Lois Lane’s thoughts? No one would care because I was nobody.

April 1
3pm

I asked Chloe if she knew something about your decision. She tried to avoid answering and judging by the way she looked at me, I'm sure she knows more than she tells me. I just can't accept that you disappeared like that. I mean I can accept that you love her (I can't bring myself to write her name) but I can't accept that you're not in my life any more. It's been 3 weeks, 4 days and 22 hours since you left me. (By the way, it's as well 3 weeks 4 days and 19 hours since I nearly saw the Blur's face. I still feel his presence like I feel yours.)

April 26
6pm

I called Martha. I had to ask her where you are. She told me you were visiting relatives. Last time someone told me that you were gone just like you're now. Where are those 'relatives'? Clark did you really tell your Mom where you went? Did she know that you chose her over me? Why did you lie to her? This is not you. It was so strange to talk to Mrs. Kent. Our conversation was so short and said she didn't have enough time. That's not like your Mom. She always had time for me. This is so weird. Everybody’s changing. Mrs. Kent. Chloe. You. There’s nothing left for me but me, myself and I. Funny isn’t it?

May 8
8am

It's your birthday. Happy Birthday, Clark! You're still gone. I get used to you not being around and on the other hand, I miss you every day more than the day before. Do you miss me too? I just hope, though I’m wondering until when I hold on to this faith that somewhere out there you‘re also thinking about me and the way we used to be. Yes, I do understand that there’s a single tiny mini microscopic chance that it will happen. Since day one that I realized my true feelings for you, I lost you too. Well, I don’t own you. I can’t lose what I never had.

I don't get it how you made me so weak. You told me once that I could lean on you for strength. Why aren't you here when I need your strength? Why am I hurting myself over and over again while you are there celebrating with her? It isn’t fair. But you deserve a birthday wish. Can I get that one because during my birthdays I wasn’t been able to wish for myself? I always wish for other’s happiness. So this is it. I’m going to type it. I wish that one of these days, I’ll wake up that I forget everything that I feel for you, so I can finally move on with my life and build myself again.

So again happy birthday…

June 20
1pm

Yeah! I wish you were here today. I got nominated for the Kerth awards!!! You were always mocking around about my articles. Now you can see that I'm good!

July 11
11am

Just returning from meeting the new editor-in-chief Perry White. Chloe told me he already met you back in Smallville. I know that he once was a good reporter then worked for one of the lowest rating TV shows and somehow made it back up. He really seems to know how journalism works. I'll keep you updated about him.

August 18
4pm

I passed by our favorite coffee shop. I’m craving for my favorite maple doughnut – which is of course – you always bought that flavor for me. Now, I’m wishing you’re going to give me a cup of coffee. Since it’s just a wish, I’m going to stand and do that for myself.

September 20
1am

I didn't get it! I'm sitting here with a huge box of double chocolate ice cream and I didn't win that stupid award.

Perry said I shouldn't be disappointed because almost nobody won the award with the first nomination. But I was so happy when I got the nomination and I hoped I could tell you when you came back, if you ever do so, that I'm a Kerth award winner.

You know I think if you had been there with me I wouldn't sit here at my desk with that stupid ice cream and feeling so useless.

Clark!!!! You should have been there with me!


November 23
8pm

Shelby’s here with me at my apartment. I borrowed him from Mister Ben Hubbard. I know, Chloe said he’s the one who takes care of Shelby and the farm. This pet of ours – I mean pet of yours really makes me sick, that’s why I had to purchase lots of allergy pills. It doesn’t matter if I’m going to sneeze all night, what matters is Shelby’s here right now, sleeping on my feet while I’m typing this message to you. He reminds me of Smallville (the person and place itself).

December 08
9am

I went to your farmhouse last night. I actually climbed up the loft to make use of your telescope. I hate to admit this, but sometimes brooding felt right. Well, I gave myself some time to think about you and the good times we spent together. By the way, I saw some meteor shower last night – it was magnificent.

December 25
6pm

I think I finally got my wish last May. Sooner or later I will stop writing these messages to you. I met Perry White’s nephew on Daily Planet’s Christmas Party last December 23. He’s nice. Not the type of boys I met during high school. I know you’re going to mock me that I usually attract the dark types, but this one – he’s decent, intelligent, funny, cute and he’s a pilot. Now I wonder, if he’s the one that I’m looking for. Years before, someone told me that I was destined to fall for a guy who flies a lot and likes to wear tights. Maybe Richard’s the one.

Merry Christmas Clark! And by the way, the Blur called me today saying Merry Christmas too. Well, I haven’t heard much about him since then; he’s too busy saving the world. I’m still thankful that he stopped by to call me. No matter what happens, I still want you and the Blur to be my best friends.


January 1
8am

I celebrated New Year’s eve with Richard White. Remember Perry White’s nephew? Yeah, he’s the one I’m talking about. It’s not like that I want you to be jealous or some sort… He’s so sweet… He cooked and it was so good. Well, cooking isn’t one of my talents, but I do know what’s appetizing or not. I can’t hide the fact that he’s attractive and he knows how to handle conversations. It won’t be difficult to fall for him. I know you’d like him. He’s nice.

Happy New Year Smallville! The Blur also called last night wishing me a happy new year.

February 14
11:59pm

Richard and the Blur called about three hours ago saying Happy Valentines… Richard sent bouquet of fresh flowers. How sweet of him. Though he said sorry for not been able to go out tonight because of a sudden meeting with his bosses. For me, it’s okay… I had another movie night while eating my favorite chocolate ice cream. Another movie about ‘waiting’ and ‘sacrifice’. It’s about Henry and Claire De Tamble, The Time Traveler’s Wife.

February 28
5:55pm

Why did you leave me?!? Where did you go?

I bumped into Lana today. She's pregnant. I thought you were the baby's father. But you're not. You're not even with her!

I still don't know what to think. I could accept that you left me for her. But now, you're just gone and didn't tell me the real reason why.

I never thought meeting her and learning that you did not leave for her could hurt so much. Why on earth did you go? First you nearly dragged me into our relationship and I tried everything to make it work. You were, maybe still are, the one with whom I wanted to make it right. But then you just left and now I'm feeling like hanging from a rooftop again. I don’t even know if I can talk to Richard right now. He's such a good guy and he wouldn't just leave pretending it was for another woman. He would tell me the real reason.

And now this new reporter Ollie talked about took over your desk. I hope he's not the badass John Corben was. You know, I knew that one day someone will take it but it still hurts to think that there will be sitting someone else than you.

And the newbie there seems to be some kind of nerd. He has one of these old fashioned briefcases and on his desk are several boxes for glasses. I haven't seen his name tag yet but no matter what his name is he'll learn to keep his distance. I hope we won't have to work together as partners like you and I did. I'm used to flying solo now and I like it. No one telling me 'Lois, it's too dangerous', 'Lois, you can't do this' or 'Lois, that's not allowed'. It's just me and the story to investigate and when my life's in danger the Blur comes to save me. He's always around when I need him. Not like you leaving me all on my own.

You know I think it's kind of sweet of Ollie that he warned me before the guy showed up. Now I can prepare myself for meeting him. But it still hurt so much when he told me and now seeing those things on your desk that aren't yours is just weird.

A pair of shoes walked towards the desk in front of me. I wouldn’t say anything. I wouldn’t pay attention or throw him a smile. Well, he didn’t have to expect that from me. We barely knew each other. Anyway, he was just a newbie. For sure, neither the two of us would care about each other’s presence. We were just co-workers and he was just a new occupant of Clark’s desk. That would be the worst thing because from now on, I had to accept the fact that he wouldn’t come back. I held the back of my head using my left hand and blinked my eyes twice. Today had been a very tiring one, though I admitted that it was a very slow news day. Maybe, I wasn’t tired physically but I was too exhausted emotionally. I could feel through my sixth sense that the man sitting across me was watching me, but I couldn’t care. It wasn’t the right time to approach him. I wasn’t in the right mood. So I decided to turn off my computer and packed my things.

“Miss Lane.”

I looked up and saw one of the trainees. He handed me the flowers and a note. I rolled my eyes as I said thanks. Lilies. Few people knew about my favorite flower. If I remembered correctly. I haven’t said anything to Richard about it.

Meet me on the rooftop. I raised my left brow. Definitely, not a Richard thing to do.

What was about this thing that kept me remembering the hurt that I suffered and still on the process of healing? I opened the door and my heart was beating so loudly. I couldn’t explain why but when I saw him standing there facing the almost dark sky, I understood why.


to be continued...

A/N: Since this thread got some hits I guess there are people reading this story. Sorry for letting you wait so long. But you know you can always register and yell at me to make me post the new part faster.
After this there are two more scenes that are more bonus material. So stay tuned if you like the writing of Josai and me. No matter if you like or dislike this story we would be glad to get ANY sort of comment or review on this story. Don't be shy just speak up.

Scene V: An Interlude: How to find my way?

Clark’s POV

I was never as happy as I was with Lois. She made me smile and laugh everyday. We were teasing each other like before we were dating but the teasing was followed by kisses so sweet sometimes tender sometimes passionate but always with a lot of love.

When she was sleeping or at work I could do my 'job' as the Blur and between the rescues I was most of the time with Lois. Chloe said she'd never seen me grinning so much.

But the light days were disturbed by my father's call. The ringing Jor-El used to call me to the fortress got louder and louder and it was difficult to ignore it any more. I had to follow it and obey my father. But how could I explain Lois that I had to disappear without revealing my secret?

One day when the ringing was too annoying to be ignored I went north but before I entered the fortress of ice and crystal I had to get my head clear and make a decision. To do so I ran in huge circles around the fortress.

Running always helped me with thinking. This time it wasn't different. The cold wind blew my hair backwards and the fresh air made my synapses firing fast and pinched my nose a little. The white landscape got a little blurry but I knew my path since I've been up here many times. The snow under my feet crunched from the cold. That was the only sound I heard beside the wind in my ears.

Now I could focus on what I had to think about.

Lois was the most wonderful woman I've ever met. I never wanted to hurt her and leaving her would be the hardest decision ever. It was even harder than when I decided to leave Lana when she married Lex.

Lana. Maybe I could use her as an excuse why I had to leave Lois? Lo knew how much I've been in love with Lana Lang in the past. And she had seen how Lana could change my world back at Chloe's wedding. Lois would understand when I said that I was still in love with Lana.

Inside a part of me screamed 'Liar! Coward! Be honest and tell her your secret!' but I ignored it and reminded myself of what my earth-parents had always told me: “Knowing your secret is dangerous, Clark!” And I never would put Lois in danger.

With that decision I could face Jor-El and ask him for the time I needed to settle things down with my life as Clark Kent.









Scene VI: Now and Forever


CLARK’s POV

After I left Lois, I went to the fortress of solitude to continue the education Jor-El wanted me to do. But I couldn't forget her. When I closed my eyes, I heard her heartbeat that my super hearing picked up. And late at night when I was in Metropolis fighting crime, I heard her sobs in Smallville.

I turned around facing the lights of the city. Lois didn't have to see my face at first. For one second the sounds of the streets, the sirens, the laughter and crying from down there was louder than the two hearts beating for each other. That reminded me of the destiny my father had set for me and the reason why I had left Lois.

The squeaking of the iron door behind me brought me back to present. Lois' steps stopped for a second. She must have spotted me standing there like Clark Kent did when he broke her heart – when I broke her heart. Then she came a little closer.

“You're here. But you still don't show your face.” Her voice was flimsy. I had to close my eyes to hold my own tears back.

Lois, I'm so sorry that I put you through all this pain!

But I said out loud, “Yes. I am here. But before I show you my face I have to tell you something.” I waited for a minute before she said something.

“You're Clark! I recognize your voice and even the oversized coat can't hide you're figure enough right now.” Lois' words were barely audible but they cut into my heart like a hot knife through butter.

I turned around, stunned that she had recognized me so quickly. When I set my eyes on her face tears were running down her cheeks reflecting the light from the moon behind me. I couldn't do else but hug her very tightly. Breathing in her scent and feeling her warm body so close tore down every little bit of protection I had built and I couldn't hold my tears any more.

I mumbled over and over again, “I'm sorry, Lois! I'm so sorry!”

For a moment that felt like an eternity, we were standing there crying in each other’s arms. Then Lois pushed me away from her to look into my face and after she gulped, twice she asked me one question: “Why?”

I took a deep breath, took her face into my hands and wiped away her tears with my thumb: “I didn't mean to hurt you.”

“But you did, more than anyone before.” Her voice was calm, firm. What she had said was just a fact.

“I'm sorry.”

Annoyed she rolled her eyes. “Stop apologizing and start explaining, Smallville!”

Surprised I looked at her and I admired her strength. For not making her angry, I began slowly: “You're right. I am Clark Kent AND the Blur. - I wasn't born in Smallville. In fact I wasn't born anywhere near this planet.”

It felt so right and wrong at the same time to tell Lois everything. But above all, it was like a recap of something that had already happened and in Lois' face, I could see that she felt like having a déjà-vu as well.

To make me go on she stated, “I guess I should stop calling you Smallville then. And you're not a meteor-freak. That seems to be the good part of it.”

Even in a situation like this, Lois managed to make me smile.

“No. I'm not a meteor-freak. The meteors are in fact fragments of the planet where I was born. It exploded and short before my birth father sent me here to save me. He wanted me to help the people here on earth. That's why I'm the Blur.”

She nodded and signaled me to go on.

“My father wants me to go through training and therefore I can't stay here. He wants me to cut all strings to humanity. That's why I left you. I'm sorry I used Lana as an excuse. But I thought it would be easier that way.”

“Easier for whom?” Lois asked sharply.

Sheepishly I replied, “I thought for both of us. But now I guess I was just too much a coward to tell you everything.”

She nodded again and asked firmly, “So why did you come back now?”

What would I give to read her mind and her feelings right now!

Quietly I answered: “Because I couldn't forget you and I heard you crying every night.”

Surprised she looked at me and gently she caressed my cheek. I closed my eyes for a second and went on: “As the Blur I promised to watch over you. I'm always around even when I'm up north for my training my hearing follows you. It happens automatically.

Lois was still eye-locked with me and placing her hands on my arms the reporter inside of her came through: “Your powers. What exactly are your powers?”

“I can bend steel. I can blast fire out of my eyes. I can hear you screaming from Metropolis to the North Pole. I can see through solid objects and I can run faster than the speed of sound.”

“That's pretty much. But...” Lois made a step back and folded her arms in front of her. “Could you please expand on the see-through-things-thing?”

I smiled. Although revealing my secret felt a little less embarrassing for me this time for Lois, it still was. So I explained quickly: “I have to focus to do so. And by the way I never have to use my x-ray since you told me everyday the color of your underwear anyway.”

Now Lois smiled. But it faded as quickly as it came and seriously, she asked me, “And why did you never tell me any of this before? You knew what the Blur meant to me. I told you – Oh yeah. I guess you were silently laughing about my childish behavior when I drooled over the Blur.”

“No. I didn't. - I... - It's dangerous to know my secret and I didn't want to put you in more danger than you already put yourself. And the reason you told me why you broke up with Oliver was because of him being Green Arrow and me being the Blur is nothing different. I just …”

Lois interrupted me slightly angry: “But it is different, Clark! You are different. And what I feel for you is different. My feelings for you are so much stronger than what I felt for Ollie. And by the way, I can take care for myself! I'm the General's daughter. Remember?”

Meekly I replied, “Yes, I know. But what about when I'm not there to give you backup?”

Now really angry Lois countered: “I don't care about your backup, Smallville!”

A short silence fell that was broken by Lois saying quietly: “I never thought someone with x-ray-vision could be so blind.”

I closed the distance between us and lifted her chin to make her look me in the eye. “What do you mean?”

With gleaming eyes, Lois replied, “I love you. I love you more than I ever thought I could love anyone. I'd give anything to be with you.”

My knees felt like giving in any second and speechless I could only kiss the lips that just confessed so strong feelings.

I replied while looking into her eyes. They shone beautifully like looking on morning dew with the sun’s ray reflecting from the east… “I love you more Lois Lane.” We stayed that spot for minutes never wanting to let go from each other’s embrace. Then I stood back while looking into her eyes. I spun around to change into my office clothes.

She giggled a little bit, which was like music into my ears. She adjusted my tie and my eyeglasses. She punched me lightly on my chest. I heard her murmur.

“I don’t mind about the geek factor. Don’t worry Smallville, I’ll only call you four-eyes every once in a while.”

She held my hand as she urged me to go inside The Planet where I could see her every day with few inches away from my old desk.

A/N: I wrote this scene for k3josai's birthday last december. We only changed it a little to make it fit into the story. And after this scene there is one last scene to come.

Bonus Material: Special Interlude: An Enchanted Morning

Lois’s POV

When I woke up everything around me was unusually quiet. Even the sounds from the barn were oddly muffled. A ray of bright sunlight came through the curtains. It seemed like a spell was laid on Smallville that made almost everyone sleep.

Only one sound just didn't want to fit to the marvelous silence. An insistent “Chhrrt, chhrrt” clinked from the farmyard. Only from time to time it was disrupted by a knocking. Since I had never heard that sound before I got up and went to the window.

I slid the curtain open and was blinded by the bright sunlight that was reflected by the fresh snow. The farm buildings were covered by a thick blanket of snow and the trees and bushes in the garden looked like wearing bonnets as well.

Shelby frolicked in the snow leaving a funny design of his traces while chasing the still falling
flakes. And at last I realized where the strange noise came from: In the middle of this white
resplendence I saw my husband shoveling snow. He even didn't bother to take a warm jacket since on the one hand the cold couldn't harm him and on the other hand the work he was doing made him getting warm.

‘Why for god's sake didn't he just use his heat-vision? That would be the fastest method to free the way to the barn and street and he could return to bed with me.’ With a sigh I turned around and went downstairs into the kitchen slipping over my warm pullover in order to prepare him some coffee until he finished his work.

After some time, I was already holding my second mug of coffee in my hands, Clark finally entered. He greeted me with a kiss as usual.

“Good morning, Lois!” He greeted vividly.

On his forehead I saw some beads of sweat sparkling. ‘Since when did Clark sweat?’
Pouring him some coffee I asked casually: “Why didn't you melt the snow with your heat-vision?”

My husband looked at me surprised and taking the mug out of my hands he laughed: “Heat-vision? But, Lois, I'm not Superman! Though I'm flattered that you see him in me.”

In my head several alarms went off simultaneously. I knew exactly that Clark Kent and Superman were one and the same person. What had happened that now he claimed not to be the Kryptonian hero? Like a reflex I felt his temperature and searched with my eyes for any hint on his body for Kryptonite. While doing so I asked:

“Are you alright? Are you in pain? Or do you have fever?”

Smiling he responded:

“Lois, I'm fine. I only shoveled snow! I'm just not used to that kind of physical work anymore since working for the Daily Planet. But I feel great! I have fun being here in Smallville again looking after the farm.” This could not be my Clark! But before I was able to ask further questions he put his mug on the table and went to the barn feeding the cattle. I tried to run after him but I tripped over my slippers.

With a sigh I decided to get dressed first and search for reasons for Clark's amnesia later. But I couldn't find anything. On the entire farm, there was nothing suspicious. No sign of a stone that might be Kryptonite could be seen in the snow. Everything was like it was supposed to be
except for my husband behaving unusually normal.

Eventually I went into the barn to help him. If I wanted to enjoy the rest of the day together with Clark, I had to make sure that the work was done soon. When I stepped next to him a bale of straw in layers above us went loose, fell down and took both of us to the ground taking my breath away.

*~*

Gasping I came around and was astonished to find myself lying in Clark's bed. Around me everything was oddly silent. Immediately I turned around grabbing beside me. Clark had already gotten up; the bed next to me was empty. The usual sounds from the barn met my ear muffled. A ray of bright sunlight came through the curtains. It seemed like a spell was laid on Smallville that made almost everyone sleep. In the farmyard I heard Shelby barking happily. With a jump, I stood at the window.

Please don’t let this be another weird morning!

I slid the curtain open and blinded by the sunlight I punched my eyes. The light was reflected by the fresh snow. Relieved I took a deep breath. The snow was neatly melted off the ways from the farmhouse to the barn and the street and my husband played tag with the dog. His boyish laughter sounded as clear as it hadn't been for a while.

The roofs of the farm, the trees, meadows and entire Smallville was thickly covered by snow. The thousands of small crystals glittering in the sunlight looked amazing. I opened the window and smelled the cold, clear air. Clark was right. It was good to escape the daily routine of Metropolis and looking after the farm. Suddenly a snowball hit me in the face and I heard Clark's laughter louder than before.

Wait until I get you!

I gathered the snow on the windowsill and made a perfect snowball. But when I was ready to throw it, Clark was standing behind me letting snow fall into the neck line of my pajamas. I hunched my shoulders and slammed the snowball into Clark's face while the ice crystals melted gliding down my back. Before I knew it I found myself lying on the bed again. But this time my husband was lying there with me kissing the melted snow from my skin. It was going to be a beautiful day!




To be continued...

A/N: This is the last of the two bonus materials... Can be treated as part of the story or not...

I hope you liked what Josai and I made here. Most of it was really Josai's work. If you did like it tell us, if not tell us as well.

Josai made this vid to thank all the readers and reviewers of this story.




Bonus Material: The Epilogue: One True Love

Clark’s POV

Watching her with my Mom while preparing something to eat had always been a favorite scene of mine. Her brown hair tied in a ponytail with slight blush on her cheeks while laughing at her favorite buddy. Ever since, I knew she would love the farm and the city equally. Her eyes were dancing in pure joy and contentment as she talked to my mother. I might be the calm on a stormy sea, but she would always be my rainbow on a rainy day. She was glowing as the days passed by so quickly. The epitome of a strong, intelligent, independent woman and at the same time she had the compassion and loyalty. I smiled unknowingly as I stood on the kitchen’s entrance while staring at the two women laughing together. It was breathtaking, listening to their giggles. She looked back at me with a wide grin and launched herself with a bear hug.

“How are you Lo?”

“That’s nice to hear taking away the lil thing.”

I kissed her cheek and then I chuckled.

“Don’t forget that it’s Lorraine.” She winked at me that made me laugh. I turned to see my mother smiling at us.

“Hey Mom. How are you?” I returned the embrace she gave me. Her hair, whitened with time, was still beautiful despite of the old age. She touched my face.

“How’s the rescue of Superman?”

“It’s okay Mom… Not that bad..”

“How about Clark Kent? It’s been years.”

“I know Mom, but it’s always been her.”

She nodded in understanding. She had always been my very supportive mother.

“Clark, the picnic basket is ready.”

“Thanks Mom.”

-------


I adjusted my eyeglasses as I sat on a grassy hill within The Kent’s Farm. Looking at her while flying her favorite ‘S’ shield kite, I opened the first page of the yellowish journal. A little smile painted on my lips as I touched on the withered Lilies.

“Hey Superman!”

I creased my forehead as I transferred my attention to the young woman running towards me while holding her kite.

“I miss doing this one, my work made me so busy.” She stopped for a while, while thinking for her next words. “When I’m flying this kite, the connection never fades, right?

I nodded. Ten years weren’t that long. She sat beside me and stared at the thing she was holding. With uneven breathing, I knew she was fighting back the tears.

“I was about to share some news today, but before that I think I need to hear some words from the journal.”

“Which part?” I asked.

She opened and browsed the pages and stopped at the last page. She handed me the book. “It’s your turn.” I adjusted my eyeglasses not knowing my hands were trembling.

May 22, 2029
3pm

‘This will be the last entry in this journal. Obviously, this is the last page…’

I chuckled this was really her.

‘A year had passed since the doctor diagnosed about my illness, though we did everything that we could do to prolong or heal me. But this is it. It can’t be altered. It can’t be changed. I won’t question God because despite of all the bad things that happened to me. The two beautiful people who are smiling right in front me are the living proof that God is still great. It feels so good to feel that someone loves you the same way as you do. Then a little one whose the exact carbon copy of me with the same strength as her Dad. Looking back I can say I lived a very fulfilling life. I won’t be there when Lorraine gets her diploma, when she marries the love of her life and bears her child. I know Clark, you’ll never leave her side, the same way as you did with me.

You may set me free, this physical body, but there’s always an invisible bond that will tie us together. I was about to finish the kite an hour or so. It will just be a remembrance that every time you fly this kite, I am the wind that softly blows it and the string of connection will never fade. I love you Smallville and Lorraine.

For the thousandth time, we’re still crying after reading Lois’s message. I wouldn’t get tired of it. She would always be my one and only.

“Happy birthday Mom… Dad… Mom… Here’s my surprise for both of you.” I eyed her questioningly. She rolled her eyes. Very Lois-like. Sometimes I wondered where I was in this daughter of mine.

“A book?” I said barely above a whisper.

“Yes!” She smiled widely. “Look here.”

“True Love by Lorraine L. Kent. Thank you… You’re Mom and I… we’re so proud of you.” I hugged her while hiding my misty eyes.

“I know Dad… I know… This is my first novel. And you know what? The release date will be on your 25th Wedding Anniversary.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, Dad… And with Mom…” She faced her tombstone. “…I’m going to read my dedication:



I ruffled my daughter’s hair, the way Lois and I did when she was young.

“Dad???” She was annoyed with my action but she also couldn’t hide the smile forming on her lips.

“Come on Lo, Oliver Queen II will still love you despite of your messy hair.”

She blushed. There, I saw myself in her. In few months time, I was about to give her away. Lois and I would forever be grateful for having Lorraine and for her precious talent for inking our beautiful story. Time would come that I would be joining my wife in the place where she was. Somewhere… The safest place where we belonged. This book of ours, we would live forever in the hearts of many by touching their lives with the tales of love and friendship of Lois and Clark.




~END~